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MARITAL BATTLES

This is another battle that everyone encounters; especially those who intend to get married. And you don’t have to wait until you are married before you confront the anti-marriage forces. It helps to start early. No matter the pursuit or achievement in life, if at a certain age, one is not married, there will be many questions to answer from family and friends. Even the word of God agrees that “it is not good that the man (or woman) should be alone.” (Genesis 2:18) This then makes marital battle an inevitable one.

It may start from the quest to know the will of God, or immediately after marriage. It may also come up in the middle of the marriage. That is, after some months or years into it. Issues like divorce or threats of divorce, infidelity of one partner, trouble from in-laws, and difficulty in child bearing may threaten the marriage, thus leading to battles to sustain the marriage. As a matter of fact, some people encounter mysterious and strange battles as soon as they get married. My prayer is that God will empower us with knowledge and understanding to overcome these battles in Jesus’ name.

Marital battle, for many, may also begin from “choice of whom to marry.” You may either marry the right person that will help advance your destiny, or the wrong person that has no part to play in your life pursuit, thus, becoming a stumbling block to you, and a battle you may have to fight throughout your lifetime. It is important at this point, to admonish singles to exercise extreme caution and discernment when choosing their life partners; so as to choose according to God’s will.

Case Study: SAMSON

Read Judges 16:4-6, 17-21 from your Bible

The birth of Samson was heralded by an angel who declared how great he would be. Specific instructions were given to his mother on how to maintain the grace of God upon his life. However, Samson missed it when he decided to venture into marriage. Marital battle brought him down. He lost marital battle and thus, lost all. He did not live to fulfill his destiny. This goes to show that marital issues, if not handled properly, can wreck one’s destiny. A person’s success in life may be directly proportional to his/her marital success. And this is irrespective of the profession one practices. Marital success reflects in other areas of life’s success. One must therefore be deliberate at making marriage work; beginning from choice of spouse or suitor. To leave this to chance is to lose the battle of life.

Marriage is the first institution God established. That is, even before the church. It is the foundation of many other things we pursue in life. In the order of institutions, our relationship with God is first, followed by marriage then the church. You can’t do God’s work or serve God effectively if the relationship you have with your spouse is not cordial and stable. We may be regarded as failures, irrespective of our achievements if we do not succeed in marriage. We must therefore pray earnestly against forces that stir up acrimony and disagreement in our homes. If there is tension in our homes, it will reflect in every other areas of our lives. One may try to cover it up, but the longer the tension persists, the sooner it will show up.

There are married couples who live as strangers under the same roof. Both of them cannot succeed. It is popularly opined that “marriage is not for boys and girls, but for mature men and women.” It is for the mature individuals. And maturity is not just measured in age but financially, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, etc. Samson loved Delilah! Who do you love as a man or woman? If the person you love is like “Delilah,” that may be the beginning of a major battle in the days ahead.

Like Samson, many people’s problem started with wrong choice in marriage. They entered into relationships with the wrong persons who did not love them. Like Delilah, their spouse is a channel through which their enemies can reach and afflict them.

May you not fall into a stranger’s hand, in marriage, in the name of Jesus.

Through marriage, a strange woman came into the life of Samson. We need to learn from Samson’s experience. He was a mighty man and had a great future with great grace of God upon him, yet suffered great loss. No matter how anointed, prayerful, dedicated and holy you are, if you lose the battle of marriage, especially in regard to choice of spouse, the rest of your destiny may be in jeopardy.

Many church leaders and good Christians have sunk their destinies by reason of wrong choice of spouse. There were those who were regarded as “rising stars,” but vanished from under the radar after their marriage, simply because they got married to a “destiny killer.” Many are so blinded by emotions and the fantasy of “love” that they ignore the place of prayer in choosing a life partner. Others ignore godly counsel and refused to be patient. Many are regretting today. Infatuation can be a major route through which the devil can cage many unsuspecting and ignorant souls. We must do away with infatuation and allow the word of God to shape our reality if we intend to win marital battles.

I pray that the light of God shines on your way in Jesus’ name.

The story of Samson is a pathetic one. At one point, he was dreaded by the Philistines; but as a result of wrong marriage, he became a prisoner in their prison. His eyes were put out, his hair shaven, and he ultimately died untimely.

Many men who were happily married suddenly became unsatisfied with their wives and got themselves involved with strange women that were full of demonic tendencies. As such, their destinies were sold out and their lives turned up-side-down. The same is the case of some women who could not maintain their marriage. They went after other men, and lost their virtues and honour in the process.

We must value our marriages and handle it with the utmost care. There are many christians who are committed and involved in church services, but are not doing so well in the area of their marriages. They have missed it. Many are married to the wrong persons while others are married but are not satisfied with their spouses, hence, commit adultery, etc. We must pray earnestly in order to locate the right person that will run with our destinies.

shalom!
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